10 HALLOWEEN HORROR MOVIES FOR YOU AND YOUR TEEN!!! MOVIE# 7

Movie #7…. The Sixth Sense!

Sixth Sense

“I see dead people….” So what? I’m a Horror Fan! I see dead people all the time and you don’t see me crying about it!

So, you have gone into hibernation and have made it back to earth safely. Boy, do I have a treat waiting for you back home. First, let me ask you this… What if your child woke up some day and suddenly has the ability to see dead people? What would you do…?

Me too! I would race to the phone and call my family psychiatrist. Well, that’s the situation we open up to in “The Sixth Sense,” A  boy who sees dead people and a psychiatrist who is trying to figure out what is wrong with this kid’s head.

So we are moving from the depths of space… barely avoiding total annihilation from a scary, deadly alien… only to come back and explore the depths of a child’s warped brain… or is it really in his head?… The reasons I chose this film are…

Reason #1– Another PG-13 Rating! Yes, we are back to a PG-13 rated film, but once again, it’s scary like a R-rated film. I put this film right on the same level of “Poltergeist.” It’s just as scary, it has the same rating and it deals with the paranormal. “The Sixth Sense” is a great film that shocked the viewers when released in 1999. Good thing is, it has no sex or sexual content what so ever! But I warn you, there are some moments and images that will make you think twice about it’s rating.

Reason #2– The lead character is a child, played by Haley Joel Osment. This movie really plays with your fears and emotions when you realize it is a young boy of around 10 that is being haunted by these terrible images. As I stated with “Silver Bullet,” if you want to make an audience cringe and completely involved, put a helpless child in harms way! Right from the beginning, you are glued to the screen wondering what is going to happen next. Then when things start to escalate, your emotions and fears reach a new level because you care for this harmless kid so much. The fact that he is 10 and is afflicted with this tremendous, terrible gift, not even most adults could handle, makes your mind do circles. Your paternal instinct kicks in and this movie uses it to scare the crap out of you!

Reason #3– It keeps you guessing. “The Sixth Sense” doesn’t only scare the crap out of you but it keeps you guessing from beginning to end. The way director M. Night Shuamalan keeps you wondering, is amazing. Right from the start, you are subjected to a quick, tragic scene! Then from out of nowhere you are with the psychiatrist at the young boy’s house. You have no idea where you are going to be taken next, all the way to the end of the film.

“The Sixth Sense” brings you on a journey of horror and fear through a child’s eyes. The fact you are helpless and don’t know what is going on, makes you relate to the main character that much more! It is a really well set up horror film and is a must see! I’m not a big fan of this director but I do love “The Sixth Sense.”

Last Reason #4– Another Twist! Yeah, I said it… Another Twist and boy is it a doozy!!! I mean a real doozy! You will find out why they set this film up so mysteriously from beginning to end. This twist is so good that I would find it hard to believe you haven’t heard about it. It was definitely a spoiler I had to dodge every step of the way until I went to see the film. The twist in this film is the final touch that makes it a masterpiece. Without this twist, this movie is just another horror film. One of the best set up twists out there! They start setting it up before they even start telling the story. I will say no more or I will give it away.

O.K. So far we have been hunted by werewolves, aliens, vampires, gremlins and ghosts! We fought them courageously and won, for now. But our next villain won’t be so easy, for they don’t fight you one on one. Which leads us to our next question. How do you fight a villain that is silent, invisible and you’re not even sure exists? How do you protect a child from what he sees and just may be a figment of his imagination?

So, grab whatever superstitious talisman you can get your hands on because I have no weapon for this villain. Sit on the couch, turn off the lights, clutch your child and get ready for a mysterious journey into the world of the unknown. I guarantee you, the whole family will be seeing dead people by the time this film ends!

Don’t forget to catch the 1st episode of “A Seat on a Train” at http://www.aseatontrain.com!

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COUNTDOWN TO SEASON 1 OF “A SEAT ON A TRAIN!” Episode 3

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The War is Over (Episode 3)- Sergeant Cignerella and his platoon are celebrating the end of the war.  But Sergeant Cignerella has one large setback, neither him nor anyone else can figure out how or when the war ended.

http://www.aseatonatrain.com

 

 

10 HALLOWEEN HORROR MOVIES FOR YOU AND YOUR TEEN!!! MOVIE# 6

Movie #6… Alien

Alien

Scared of Aliens…..? No….?  Well you will be! Put away your reese’s pieces because these creatures don’t have a taste for candy and you certainly don’t want them camping out in your shed. Hell, you don’t even want these creatures close to your solar system… or galaxy, for that matter. To meet this villain, your teen is going to have to travel to a galaxy far, far away, but the terror will be right there, with you, in your living room. The reasons I picked this film are…

Reason #1– It compares to Poltergeist in content. Besides a few violent scenes and bad language, this film is fine. It’s scary as crap, but if your teen survived “Poltergeist” then they will be fine with “Alien.” They are both equally scary but Alien is a little bit more violent. Actually, if it wasn’t for one really violent, gruesome scene, that only lasts for a few seconds, I would give “Alien” a PG-13 rating. So if your teen is good up to now, they have graduated and deserve to test the true waters of horror. It’s time to give him/her a little more lead way. Good thing is, there is no nudity and very little sexual content.

Reason #2– Ridley Scott directed it! Now here is a director who doesn’t really specialize in horror, but when he puts a film out, you want to go see it. All of his films are original and he is constantly setting trends in Hollywood. Gladiator, Blade Runner, American Ganster, Black Hawk Down are some films you may know… just to name a few.

The great thing about Ridley Scott is you know you are going to see something new and original when you go to one of his films. “Alien” is a perfect example of Scott’s genius. It opened the gateway to many alien horror films to follow in the 80’s and is still copied/squealed to this day.

Reason #3– It is a totally, unpredictable, original horror/sci-fi film.  Welcome your teen to the sic-fi/horror subgenre. It’s been around since Rod Serling created “The Twilight Zone,” but Ridley Scott pretty much reinvented the genre with the film “Alien.”

From the opening scene, you have no idea what is going on and what is going to happen next.Scott brings you into another world that you can’t really relate to but he keeps your interest by being completely mysterious. You become one of the crew members and just like them, you have no idea what is going to happen next. Let me tell you, this really builds the tension in this film. Scott keeps you on the edge of your seat, wondering what is out there. But when he delivers, you will not be disappointed.

Reason #4– The villain is nothing short from terrifying! Just like “Jaws,” you hardly see the villain and boy does that add to the tension. When I saw this film, it terrified me! (Even the ride at Disney World scared the crap out of me!) “Alien” kept me guessing from the opening scene all the way to the end. And let me tell you, this is one of the most ruthless villains in film history! Not only do you not know who or what it is, but you and the crew come to find there is no reasoning with this villain at all! Hell, you can’t even communicate with it! It just wants to kill and destroy everything! You sure as hell can’t distract it because it’s an alien from another planet, so you don’t even know how it thinks. Besides the fact, even if you could communicate with it, you are dead within seconds of an encounter, so communication is not in your best interest. Let me tell you, this movie rocks when it comes to tension and fear! Scott sets the bar high and delivers! He keeps you guessing from the beginning to the end. And the payoff is huge!

The Last Reason #5– A strong female lead! Not only did the villain create a buzz about this film, but the hero did also. You want your teen to learn a new respect for women, then have them watch Sigourney Weaver in this film. She is perfectly cast and is one bad ass babe! She shows us that there is no women’s rights issues in the far future because she knows how to fight and she is fighting a creature that no sensible man would want to go up against! So when the action takes a break, you are still absorbed with the story because this female character is so interesting and mysterious herself.

So, fuel up your space ship and put on your gear because it’s going to be a bumpy ride! If you really want to mess with your teen, tell him/her “Alien” is a sequel to “ET.”  They won’t trust you ever again, but how funny would that be? I know for sure, this Alien’s heart isn’t glowing at all! And if you want touch fingers with this creature, don’t expect to get them back!

So it’s time for another ride into the terrifying, mysterious world of horror. You may have to travel far for this one, but I guarantee you it will scare the crap out of you. Make sure you call a doctor immediately if your tummy starts to hurt. (you’ll understand what I mean when you see this film.)

And don’t forget to check out my new tv series which is releasing on Halloween at http://www.aseatonatrain.com.

COUNTDOWN TO SEASON 1 OF “A SEAT ON A TRAIN!”

So, as you most know by now, “Out of Place” the 1st episode of “A Seat on a Train” is premiering on Halloween 2013! Well, in honor of this milestone I am going to give you descriptions and a poster of each individual episode in season 1! If you love “The Twilight Zone” then why don’t you come take “A Seat on a Train.”

EPISODE 2- THE PERFECT WOMAN

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The Perfect Woman (Episode 2)- A successful, good-looking businessman, Andrea, discovers an odd solution to nagging women in relationships.  He buys a real life sex doll, a doll that looks and feels like a woman but is not real and most importantly, can’t think.  But his perfect world is shattered when the doll begins to talk and make demands.

And don’t forget to come and check out the website for “A Seat on a Train” at http://www.aseatonatrain.com

10 HALLOWEEN HORROR MOVIES FOR YOU AND YOUR TEEN!!! MOVIE# 5

Movie #5 is…… Scream!!!

Scream

So at this point you should have a garlic necklace, a gun loaded with a silver bullet, all your furniture nailed down and constantly checking your mechanical devices for little green creatures! Paranoid yet?

Well, it’s about to get worse because this next film introduces you to a villain that exists in our everyday life. It’s a villain that every person thinks about when walking down a dark alley at night. It’s a villain that created this whole sub genre but it didn’t happen in some small room with a typewriter. No, this villain is easy to find facts about, research and get this… most of it’s true!! The villain is the Serial Killer!

Now we are making that leap from safe content to the more violent content. I am trying to do this as gradually and as harmless as possible. But I can’t think of a better film to introduce the serial killer to your teen. These are the reasons I picked this film.

Reason #1– It’s somewhat teen friendly even though it’s rated R. Now “Scream” is rated R and by all means, it deserves this rating. It is extremely violent and has a few adult themes you may feel is inappropriate for your teen. But if you want to introduce them to horror films, then you are going to have to make some exceptions.

Now out of all the slasher films I think “Scream” is the best choice. Even though it is extremely violent, it has no nudity or sex scenes. If you rent “Friday the 13th,” “A Nightmare on Elm Street” or any other good slasher film, you are probably going to be faced with nudity and sex scenes. That’s why “Scream” got the pick. But let me warn you, they talk about sex and other inappropriate things, but at least you wont feel uncomfortable with watching nudity and sex scenes with your teen.

Reason #2– It was made for teens. This movie was definitely made for the younger crowd even though it’s so violent. Most of the characters are teenagers, what they talk about is teen stuff and the heroine is a teenager. There is no doubt in my mind that this film will grab your teen’s attention and keep it throughout! If he/she gets bored during this film, then there is something wrong with them. Get them a psychiatrist and hide the knife block, because your teen may be a serial killer in the making.

Reason #3– It’s a great intro to slasher films. Now, by no means do I think this is the best slasher film of all time. It’s not even in my top five but I do have a respect for it. Especially when it comes to explaining the slasher sub genre. Not only will this film keep your kid glued to the tv but it will also educate him on slasher films.

There is a great subplot going on throughout the whole film where two nerdy horror fanatics fight over slasher films. They dissect all the great killer films from the past and discuss the elements that all slasher films need to include to be considered a great slasher film. It is hard to explain but they also implement this into the plot and the whole film. It is genius. But let’s face it, you have a genius directing this film. Which leads me to Reason #4.

Reason #4– Wes Craven directed it! If you want an expert on good slasher films, then I think it goes without saying that Wes Craven makes the top of that list. If you are not familiar, he also directed the original “Nightmare on Elm Street,”  the original “Last House on the Left” and the original “The Hills Have Eyes.”  (You see what I mean about remakes! I have to state “the original” on almost every famous horror classic out there! It’s ridiculous!)

Anyway, these are all very famous slasher films that helped develop the horror films we watch today. This man is a master of horror. Believe it or not, but “Scream” is one of his more subtle films. Wow, that’s a scary thought.

The Last Reason #5– The mask! In all great Slasher films the villain has some sort of look, weapon or way of killing that separates him/her from the others. Scream does this amazingly and really creates a scary, memorable villain. His weapon is a huge kitchen knife that he jabs and lunges at his victims. His signature phone calls really sets up the tension before a murder is about to happen. And the most successful element that really separates this movie from others is the mask. This mask they chose is both chilling and memorable. When you spot the villain in the shadows, it is scary. This movie really plays with you and does it in a very original way. “Scream” is a really smart slasher film that puts the campiness in there on purpose. If they didn’t, it would’t be a campy slasher film. On top of that it comments on it’s campiness. It really is a well written, executed film. I should give it more props but I can’t turn my back on the classics that made “Scream” possible.

So, there we go, film #5. So lock all your doors. Check all your closets and crawl spaces because it is about to get really scary for you and your teen. This movie will not disappoint and will probably become a favorite for your teen.

So unplug the phones, hide any weapons where only you can find them and get ready to have the crap scared out of you. Definitely not the movie you want to watch before you go trick or treating!

Also, don’t forget to check out my television series “A Seat on a Train” which releases this Halloween 2013 at http://www.aseatonatrain.com. If you love “The Twilight Zone” then come take “A Seat on a Train.”

THE HAUNTINGS THAT BRING A SCARE OF PLEASURE FOR HALLOWEEN

“I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure.” Clarence Darrow

I like to think I have one true surprise in this life and it so happens to be my death. I don’t know how, I don’t know when and no clue as to what happens after; but I do know that I would like my physical being to be burned at sea not shoveled into the ground. Speaking of shoveling, lets take a look at where the dead live. The three most haunted cemeteries.

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ST. LOUIS CEMETERY 1, NEW ORLEANS – This is among the oldest and most famous of cemeteries, it opened in 1789. In the 19th century, Marie Laveau the “Queen of Voodoo” is said to materialize annually to lead her faithful followers in worship on St. John’s Eve. There is also a way to summon Marie Laveau if you dare.

They say if you

  1. Deface the grave of Marie Laveau by drawing three X’s in black chalk
  2. Knock three times to make your presence known
  3. You will be visited by her angry spirit that very night

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STULL CEMETERY (GATES TO HELL) KANSAS – This darling cemetery is known as one of the gateways to hell, Satan himself is said to appear on Halloween in the rubble of the old church there. He is said to have had a child by a witch and it is buried in this cemetery.

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WESTERN BURIAL GROUND, WESTMINSTER PRESBYTERIAN CHURCHYARD, BALTIMORE, MD – One of my sweet pleasures Mr. Edgar Allan Poe was buried here in October of 1849. As story has it the ghost of dear Edgar comes to haunt the grounds around his birthday in January. The Cambridge skull is another eerie tale that hails from this cemetery; a minister was murdered and decapitated but his skull never stopped screaming. They gagged and buried his skull in cement, but the screams can be heard at all times of the day to the point of claiming the lives of individuals to insanity.

Dont’t forget to come visit us at http://www.aseatonatrain.com

Creepy dreams my sexy minions.

10 HALLOWEEN HORROR MOVIES FOR YOU AND YOUR TEEN!!! MOVIE# 4

(for all the posts about this subject- go to the categories section on your left)

Movie #4 is…. Poltergeist!!!

Poltergeist

I am so excited about this one for so many reasons! It really is the best paranormal movie I have ever seen! If you are over 20 and you haven’t seen this film… then shame on you!!! If you are a horror fan and you haven’t seen this film… then double shame on you!!! Stop everything you are doing now and watch this film!! It’s a masterpiece!!! From casting down to the locations… everything is perfect in this film! This is a must see on Halloween!! Forget about all the horror blockbusters coming out in the theaters! They are not going to top this film! “Paranormal Activity” looks like a High School play compared to this film! Do you get it? I like… no… I love this film and it is in the top five of the best horror movies of all time on my list! Now for the reasons I picked this masterpiece.

Reason #1– Didn’t you hear me? It’s one of the best horror movies of all time! You need no reason other than that…well.. besides it being PG! Yeah, I said it… PG! Now after introducing you to a film I felt didn’t deserve a R rating, I feel the opposite about this movie. I don’t know how they pulled off a PG rating because this film is far more scarier than any of the films I have mentioned previous. Someone on the crew gave the ratings board a nice greasy handshake or something. This movie goes to show that the ratings board was all over the place in the 80’s.

Poltergeist is disturbing both psychologically and emotionally. There are scenes in this film that still make me cringe just thinking about them!  But it is PG. So if they say it’s safe for kids, then I guess it is. In defense of the ratings board it doesn’t have any nudity or bad language, but the images and the situations would make me rate it at least PG-13. The parents smoke pot in one scene for God’s sake! So if you feel your teenager can handle a PG-13 movie then watch it. But I’m warning you, it will scare the crap out of everyone. If it doesn’t, then you are a better man than me.

Reason #2– Remember when I said Spielberg will pop up again and it will be a project you will have no idea he had a hand in? Well here it is and another reason to watch this film. Steven Speilberg teamed up with writer Michael Grais and wrote the screenplay for Poltergeist. But, very unusual for Spielberg, he didn’t direct it. No… My favorite horror movie director of all time directed it.

So, again, I highly recommend this film because Speilberg had a hand in it. And once again, he plays on everyone’s fears, young and old. But let me tell you, he is not as kind to the younger viewer in this one. I don’t think he would have been as extreme if he directed it. Which leads me to the #3 reason you should watch Poltergeist!

Reason #3– Tobe Hooper directed it! Now if you don’t know who Tobe Hooper is then you haven’t seen horror. This man is one of the best horror movie directors out there! He shot right into fame when he wrote and directed my second favorite horror movie of all time- the original 1974 version of “The Texas Chainsaw Masacre!” It pains me that I have to state it as the original! There is no reason at all that there should be a remake out there! And by the way, the remake sucks!!! Plain and simple!!! It’s an atrocity! Honestly, the people responsible for this should be shot! Unexcusable! Don’t see it!

(Soap box time- Hollywood!!! Stop remaking movies!!! Enough already!! It’s bad enough you can’t come up with original ideas that you are willing to take a risk on; but to take great classics and remake them… Stop it!!! Enough already!!! This is ridiculous you greedy whores!!! But thats only the tip of the iceberg… the straw that broke the camel’s back for me was when I heard that they were remaking “Casablanca!” And if that’s not bad enough, guess who they wanted to star as Humphrey Bogart’s role? Ben Affleck!!! Yeah!!! I said it!!! Look it up!!! They were going to remake one of the best movies of all time and then put Ben Affleck in it!!! Is there no respect what so ever for our classics!!! Michael Curtis is rolling over in his grave right now!!! But it doesn’t stop there folks… Guess who was going to play the Ingrid Bergman character… you ready for this… it gets worse… way worse…………………… Jennifer Lopez!!! Jennifer freaking Lopez!!! I just threw up in my mouth!!! I can’t talk about this anymore! It’s too upsetting!)

So the unlikely team of Speilberg and Hooper got together. I honestly feel if Speilberg directed this, it wouldn’t have been as scary. Sorry Speilberg, but there is no one better at creating scary moments emotionally, mentally and through sounds than Tobe Hooper. He is a master. If you don’t believe me watch the original “Texas Chainsaw Masacre.” He shot the movie on a paper thin budget and it is scary and equally disturbing. Well, with Poltergeist,  he had a much larger budget to play with and he takes advantage of it. Just when you think this movie is over, it’s just starting to get scary. It also has a pretty cool twist at the end. You know how I love twists.

Reason #4– It’s a perfect introduction to paranormal horror. This movie is the best of the best. If you wondered what a realistic haunting looks like, Poltergeist gives you a perfect example. The movie is so realistic and really knows how to suck you in. Even though it’s fiction, if they told me it was based on a true story, I would believe it… and I don’t even believe in paranormal occurrences. Actually, I hardly even like the sub genre at all. But this movie is so amazing that it could be about haunted dog dung and I would still like it!

Last Reason #5– It plays on the whole family’s fears.  This movie is the perfect blueprint that every horror movie writer, director and producer should look at before they shoot their own horror movie. Spielberg and Hooper set this one up perfectly. They really know how to play with their audiences’ emotions. They accomplish this by making the movie about a typical, everyday, middle class, caucasian family from the 80’s. This family is perfectly cast, including Craig T. Nelson and JoBeth Williams. There’s a little, cute, blonde girl and the typical older brother and sister. And of course you can’t forget the family Golden Retriever.

You, as an audience, really relate to this family, watching them go through their everyday life, doing everyday things, just like we do. They really take their time with this. They set you up perfectly. They even go through the trouble of showing the parents smoking pot, so they don’t look too perfect to you. Just to let you know, this family has flaws just like you and I.  Before you even see a scary scene you have already become a part of the family.

Now after they set you up perfectly, they slowly draw you into the mysterious horror. Here they take their time also, but let me tell you, when the wheels come off the bus… They all come off at the same time and that bus goes flying off a cliff and crashing into the ground. And just when you thought it was all over, that bus explodes and kills everyone around it! Once this movie gets going.. it just keeps on going and going. The first time I saw this film, not only did I have nightmares for weeks, I was also completely exhausted when the movie finished. They just don’t stop at the family, they pick out all of your childhood fears, mix them up in a large cauldron consisting of ghosts, clowns, scary trees and haunted tv’s. Sounds ridiculous doesn’t it? Well it’s far from that!

I hope I didn’t scare anyone away. I know I seem very cautious with this one but I would show it to my teen of 13, so it should be good for your teen also. It really is amazing and you definitely wont stop thinking about it after.

So, make sure all your kitchen cabinets are closed, everything is in it’s right place, put away the ouija board and sit down for some scary, paranormal fun!!! Don’t be surprised when the couch starts shaking and someone gets trapped in the tv. (you’ll understand what I mean when you see the film.)