(for all the posts about this subject- go to the categories section on your left)
Movie #4 is…. Poltergeist!!!
I am so excited about this one for so many reasons! It really is the best paranormal movie I have ever seen! If you are over 20 and you haven’t seen this film… then shame on you!!! If you are a horror fan and you haven’t seen this film… then double shame on you!!! Stop everything you are doing now and watch this film!! It’s a masterpiece!!! From casting down to the locations… everything is perfect in this film! This is a must see on Halloween!! Forget about all the horror blockbusters coming out in the theaters! They are not going to top this film! “Paranormal Activity” looks like a High School play compared to this film! Do you get it? I like… no… I love this film and it is in the top five of the best horror movies of all time on my list! Now for the reasons I picked this masterpiece.
Reason #1– Didn’t you hear me? It’s one of the best horror movies of all time! You need no reason other than that…well.. besides it being PG! Yeah, I said it… PG! Now after introducing you to a film I felt didn’t deserve a R rating, I feel the opposite about this movie. I don’t know how they pulled off a PG rating because this film is far more scarier than any of the films I have mentioned previous. Someone on the crew gave the ratings board a nice greasy handshake or something. This movie goes to show that the ratings board was all over the place in the 80’s.
Poltergeist is disturbing both psychologically and emotionally. There are scenes in this film that still make me cringe just thinking about them! But it is PG. So if they say it’s safe for kids, then I guess it is. In defense of the ratings board it doesn’t have any nudity or bad language, but the images and the situations would make me rate it at least PG-13. The parents smoke pot in one scene for God’s sake! So if you feel your teenager can handle a PG-13 movie then watch it. But I’m warning you, it will scare the crap out of everyone. If it doesn’t, then you are a better man than me.
Reason #2– Remember when I said Spielberg will pop up again and it will be a project you will have no idea he had a hand in? Well here it is and another reason to watch this film. Steven Speilberg teamed up with writer Michael Grais and wrote the screenplay for Poltergeist. But, very unusual for Spielberg, he didn’t direct it. No… My favorite horror movie director of all time directed it.
So, again, I highly recommend this film because Speilberg had a hand in it. And once again, he plays on everyone’s fears, young and old. But let me tell you, he is not as kind to the younger viewer in this one. I don’t think he would have been as extreme if he directed it. Which leads me to the #3 reason you should watch Poltergeist!
Reason #3– Tobe Hooper directed it! Now if you don’t know who Tobe Hooper is then you haven’t seen horror. This man is one of the best horror movie directors out there! He shot right into fame when he wrote and directed my second favorite horror movie of all time- the original 1974 version of “The Texas Chainsaw Masacre!” It pains me that I have to state it as the original! There is no reason at all that there should be a remake out there! And by the way, the remake sucks!!! Plain and simple!!! It’s an atrocity! Honestly, the people responsible for this should be shot! Unexcusable! Don’t see it!
(Soap box time- Hollywood!!! Stop remaking movies!!! Enough already!! It’s bad enough you can’t come up with original ideas that you are willing to take a risk on; but to take great classics and remake them… Stop it!!! Enough already!!! This is ridiculous you greedy whores!!! But thats only the tip of the iceberg… the straw that broke the camel’s back for me was when I heard that they were remaking “Casablanca!” And if that’s not bad enough, guess who they wanted to star as Humphrey Bogart’s role? Ben Affleck!!! Yeah!!! I said it!!! Look it up!!! They were going to remake one of the best movies of all time and then put Ben Affleck in it!!! Is there no respect what so ever for our classics!!! Michael Curtis is rolling over in his grave right now!!! But it doesn’t stop there folks… Guess who was going to play the Ingrid Bergman character… you ready for this… it gets worse… way worse…………………… Jennifer Lopez!!! Jennifer freaking Lopez!!! I just threw up in my mouth!!! I can’t talk about this anymore! It’s too upsetting!)
So the unlikely team of Speilberg and Hooper got together. I honestly feel if Speilberg directed this, it wouldn’t have been as scary. Sorry Speilberg, but there is no one better at creating scary moments emotionally, mentally and through sounds than Tobe Hooper. He is a master. If you don’t believe me watch the original “Texas Chainsaw Masacre.” He shot the movie on a paper thin budget and it is scary and equally disturbing. Well, with Poltergeist, he had a much larger budget to play with and he takes advantage of it. Just when you think this movie is over, it’s just starting to get scary. It also has a pretty cool twist at the end. You know how I love twists.
Reason #4– It’s a perfect introduction to paranormal horror. This movie is the best of the best. If you wondered what a realistic haunting looks like, Poltergeist gives you a perfect example. The movie is so realistic and really knows how to suck you in. Even though it’s fiction, if they told me it was based on a true story, I would believe it… and I don’t even believe in paranormal occurrences. Actually, I hardly even like the sub genre at all. But this movie is so amazing that it could be about haunted dog dung and I would still like it!
Last Reason #5– It plays on the whole family’s fears. This movie is the perfect blueprint that every horror movie writer, director and producer should look at before they shoot their own horror movie. Spielberg and Hooper set this one up perfectly. They really know how to play with their audiences’ emotions. They accomplish this by making the movie about a typical, everyday, middle class, caucasian family from the 80’s. This family is perfectly cast, including Craig T. Nelson and JoBeth Williams. There’s a little, cute, blonde girl and the typical older brother and sister. And of course you can’t forget the family Golden Retriever.
You, as an audience, really relate to this family, watching them go through their everyday life, doing everyday things, just like we do. They really take their time with this. They set you up perfectly. They even go through the trouble of showing the parents smoking pot, so they don’t look too perfect to you. Just to let you know, this family has flaws just like you and I. Before you even see a scary scene you have already become a part of the family.
Now after they set you up perfectly, they slowly draw you into the mysterious horror. Here they take their time also, but let me tell you, when the wheels come off the bus… They all come off at the same time and that bus goes flying off a cliff and crashing into the ground. And just when you thought it was all over, that bus explodes and kills everyone around it! Once this movie gets going.. it just keeps on going and going. The first time I saw this film, not only did I have nightmares for weeks, I was also completely exhausted when the movie finished. They just don’t stop at the family, they pick out all of your childhood fears, mix them up in a large cauldron consisting of ghosts, clowns, scary trees and haunted tv’s. Sounds ridiculous doesn’t it? Well it’s far from that!
I hope I didn’t scare anyone away. I know I seem very cautious with this one but I would show it to my teen of 13, so it should be good for your teen also. It really is amazing and you definitely wont stop thinking about it after.
So, make sure all your kitchen cabinets are closed, everything is in it’s right place, put away the ouija board and sit down for some scary, paranormal fun!!! Don’t be surprised when the couch starts shaking and someone gets trapped in the tv. (you’ll understand what I mean when you see the film.)